Well, here you are at your college graduation. And I know what you’re thinking: “Gimme the sheepskin and get me outta here!” But not so fast. First you have to listen to a commencement speech.

Don’t moan. I’m not going to “pass the wisdom of one generation down to the next.” I’m a member of the 1960s generation. We didn’t have any wisdom.

We were the moron generation. We were the generation that believed we could stop the Vietnam War by growing our hair long and dressing like circus clowns. We believed drugs would change everything — which they did, for John Belushi. We believed in free love. Yes, the love was free, but we paid a high price for the sex.

My generation spoiled everything for you. It has always been the special prerogative of young people to look and act weird and shock grown-ups. But my generation exhausted the Earth’s resources of the weird. Weird clothes — we wore them. Weird beards — we grew them. Weird words and phrases — we said them. So, when it came your turn to be original and look and act weird, all you had left was to tattoo your faces and pierce your tongues. Ouch. That must have hurt. I apologize.

So now, it’s my job to give you advice. But I’m thinking: You’re finishing 16 years of education, and you’ve heard all the conventional good advice you can stand. So, let me offer some relief…

Read the rest RIGHTCHERE.

A series of attacks on dyed-hair, eye-makeup-wearing emo kids began in early March when several hundred people went on an emo-beating rampage in Querétaro, a town of 1.5 million about 160 miles north of Mexico City.

The next week, shaggy-haired emo teenagers were harassed again by punks and rockabillys in the capital, prompting police protection and a segment on the TV news. Most recently, a Mexican newspaper reported that metal heads and gangsters have warned Tijuana’s emo kids to stay away from the town’s fair next month.

But the so-called emos are organizing, too. Last week, they demonstrated against the violence, pictured above, and Wednesday some met with police in Mexico City.

“They’re organizing to defend their right to be emo,” wrote Daniel Hernandez of LA Weekly on his personal blog, which has provided stellar coverage of the whole affair.

Courtesy of UNDERWIRE.

While differences in musical style are a significantly more valid reason to kick someone’s teeth in than differences in musical origin (SEE: Bad Boy vs. Death Row), in my opinion everyone involved is equally worthless.  Emo because it espouses an effeminate and unnatural role for men as an execution stroke in the war of man vs. wuss, and Mexico because…well, let’s face it.  It’s MEXICO.

And now, for your viewing pleasure…100% pure, high-octane nightmare fuel.

I made repeated attempts to make this a purely political blog and in every case I rapidly lost interest. So, rather than spreading myself thin I have started fresh. This site will be about me in general…who I am, what I do, what I think. Fear not, I’m not going all emo, people. I don’t have the the kind of butt it takes to fill out women’s jeans. Thank God.

I’ll post art, tutorials, rants, all that stuff. If you like it, cool. If you don’t, leave. I’m here to entertain me.

The reboot starts today.